Innasense

2020-09-13 09:12 pm

OCDemons

An O for the things that I just can’t let go 
And maybe it’s not even the same things as last week,
But there all the same, 
Ground into my head 
As though they were the only thoughts that ever mattered
Sacred and necessary 
Though likely invisible or nonexistent
just a few days ago 
And maybe tucked 
back into the void 
In just a few more 

But I suppose it’s better than time spent 
Wondering 
What a head-on collision would be like 
Or how it might feel 
To put knife through bone 

It’s dangerous 
Inside my head sometimes 

C for the things that I just can’t not do 
Always look right when crossing a bridge 
Wear just enough purple 
Get the numbers right 
Watch the color patterns 
Check and check and check again 

I tell myself I do these things  
To clear a clouded head 
Unfortunately 
Seems to do 
The opposite instead 

D for the disorder in my head 
Brought on by 
A record on repeat all day, 
A ridiculous collection of 
unbreakable rules 
And the “honestly, 
what would REALLY happen?” 
Thoughts that make me feel insane 
The static buzz inside my brain 

So I 
Read it away. 
Write it away. 
Breathe it away. 
(Over)Think. It. Away. 
To Hell with you demons. 
Go plague someone else today. 

Oh...and see you in a little bit. 
😉😑