Gord
2021-04-09 03:34 am
If I were a kite, That could fly away, with my only child, Or decide otherwise, I think I would stay.
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Gord
2020-12-04 02:41 am
Ball fist, if wishes could talk, One would place their chips down; If life were a play, or odd film, Kings would admit our wrongs, But it's not. Wishing could be in your head, Talking all things that god is, Appending the self at the end, Thinking itself less important, But it's not.
Lynn
2020-10-29 11:27 pm
these are the golden years, the golden day, she says like the sunrise or the sunset? i say both. or neither. she says do you miss it? she says your youth, i mean. i know. i miss it. i am still young. it has been torn from my chest and weighs on my hips and i miss it. i say how was your birthday? she says better than before, i say. before what? the moment it became my birthday. were you gifted anything? she says on which birthday? i say all of them. or none. she says do you think we could preserve this moment, cast it in gold or bronze or iron? she says no. who said that? i pick up the mirror and drag it home. ten, nineteen, two thousand and one.
Gord
2020-10-20 04:08 pm
Is my life but a minor arc? Mirror dark, a nine of hearts, Why walk into the distant fog, Past miles of silver boxes, Simple props with silver foxes, Waiting for their turn to balk. I could write ironic of a pen who talks, Night-time bombings, a man who moved on, Wildlife watching. 'Will I be fed to dogs' The pen responds: 'Terrified by conflict you write a law, But will the dogs obey? I think not.'
Innasense
2020-10-10 09:54 pm
Warning: this is looooooong and if you’re a sensitive individual the first parts may bother you. But hopefully the last part will inspire you. Speak your truths friends. The ones who matter will love you all the harder. #worldmentalhealthday Hidden Stories They smiled, jokingly told her she looked tired, “Must’ve partied hard last night.” Smile quietly returned, “just didn’t sleep too well I guess.” She didn’t tell them how hard it was to get out of bed this morning, How sleep never came last night, How it felt like the darkness would just swallow her whole, How she felt hollow and empty and there weren’t any tears left, just an ache deep within that wouldn’t subside. And maybe if she just squeezed her eyes shut and stayed in that bed in the blacked out void, She wouldn’t have to face another day of faked smiles and “I’m ok” lies. “Just tired today I guess.” “It’s warm today man!” “What’s with the long sleeves all the time?” “Got some crazy tattoos under there?” He smiled, laughed along with them, Self-consciously ran his hands over his wrists. Over the bandages binding his secrets. They didn’t know how close he got last night, how he almost let go, How so much blood, HIS blood swirled down the drain, mixing with his tears. He was sure no one would miss him, but he wondered if he would miss this world, And the good days out in the sun, Few and far between as they were. What would they say if he were gone tomorrow? “You should’ve come out with us last night. You would’ve had so much fun...” She nodded and made those “next time” promises, though she knew they were lies. She’d stay home again, Wrapped in the icy grips of loneliness, Which felt somehow better than her burning cheeks when the right words just wouldn’t come, or the wrong ones spilled out, and she felt their eyes on her, Panic rising, thoughts frozen Wishing she’d just stayed home, Away from the judgement, And all the wrong moves she always made “Haven’t seen you around in a while! Doing ok?” His mouth smiled, head nodded, lips formed words he’d said so often, automatic. Because, really, he thought, How could I describe that moment last night, body curled up with forehead cold against the kitchen floor, Ears covered to block out the voices, Silent screams wracking his body as the panic overwhelmed him, No breath to speak, And who could he call anyway, How would he explain these moments of pure fear that slipped in unnoticed and become everything, took everything, until he was a shivering shell of himself. Sometimes he wondered, if they could see through him, would they think him weak? Would they walk away...? These people are all make-believe, but the experiences are not, taken from articles and discussions and sometimes even revelations from real-life friends. These are not my stories, but they are someone’s truths, Not their weakness, Not their short-lived sadness that they can just “get over” if you try hard enough to make them happy. (My gosh do I need to remind myself of that part sometimes...) But that doesn’t mean you stop trying. Love them y’all. Love them so damn much that you’ll sometimes break through the cracks in their self-inflicted armor. Listen to them, Give them the chance to be open and honest, And if what they say makes you flinch, imagine what it must feel like for them. Do something kind that makes them smile and get ready to do it again tomorrow. Smile and laugh with them. Cry with them. Be genuine with your thoughts and feelings. Give them space, but check on them. Pull them out of the dark for just a moment, say, “I’m here for you when you need me. And I always will be.” Mental health issues are often invisible, but still feel debilitating to the one inside that head. Stay educated. Be understanding. Love the hell out of each other. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎💗
Blake Garner
2020-09-15 10:47 am
No secrets You keep me speechless, I can not lie I hate that I love you, If you knew the damage Would you love me correctly, The hell you put me through I no longer want to be on the ride, You knew I from the start That I fall hard and fast, I try to feel ok While you play with my emotions, There's no need to explain If you think what your doing is ok, I can try to get up and feel ok again But I'm just domino in your game, Does this make you feel better Being on top in this one sided love, I wake up in terror To ask myself what am I doing here, Why do I let myself endure The torture of your love, I can not lie I love you, No more holding inside This dirty little secret I keep, I'm tired of the mistreatment I'm tired of the avoidance, You say I hurt you From a drunken fight, Its time to bring to light Your drunken words, When we met you knew I was unwell, One night amongst your drunken lips You spoke to me a terrible fate, It haunts me in my thoughts The DJ to my demons party, You spoke love sober Yet you spoke death drunk, Your tinder lips slipped I wish you would've died, You hated me for what I did You hated the fact I was broken, I set it aside for the sheer fact That I love you truly, However you still to this day Blame my mental instability, I try so hard every day I fight for my next breath.
Innasense
2020-09-13 09:12 pm
OCDemons An O for the things that I just can’t let go And maybe it’s not even the same things as last week, But there all the same, Ground into my head As though they were the only thoughts that ever mattered Sacred and necessary Though likely invisible or nonexistent just a few days ago And maybe tucked back into the void In just a few more But I suppose it’s better than time spent Wondering What a head-on collision would be like Or how it might feel To put knife through bone It’s dangerous Inside my head sometimes C for the things that I just can’t not do Always look right when crossing a bridge Wear just enough purple Get the numbers right Watch the color patterns Check and check and check again I tell myself I do these things To clear a clouded head Unfortunately Seems to do The opposite instead D for the disorder in my head Brought on by A record on repeat all day, A ridiculous collection of unbreakable rules And the “honestly, what would REALLY happen?” Thoughts that make me feel insane The static buzz inside my brain So I Read it away. Write it away. Breathe it away. (Over)Think. It. Away. To Hell with you demons. Go plague someone else today. Oh...and see you in a little bit. 😉😑
Blake Garner
2020-09-12 06:42 pm
You would not believe your eyes If you seen all the dark thoughts, I keep at tide inside my head If only that was true, I can no longer control these racing thought, I'm a danger to myself I've succumb to pain, I've felt numb for too long I inflict pain to just feel something, Thoughts constantly racing Never a chance to think straight, I've found a healthy affliction In the pain I inflict upon myself, I can feel it now Like cardiac arrest, The slip of the chair The tension around my neck, Ill try my best, The pull of the blade Against my wrist, I've been trying my best How much do I invest, Before its all over No longer numb, My Demons They catch me when I slip, Motor control loss Mindless acts, Just a permanent solution To a temporary feeling, Exactly how long is temporary All i want is for this living nightmare to be over, These demons consuming me alive Fighting is no longer a solution, Don't stop me now I know now noone would shed a tear, Noone would shutter a sound To stop me, Forget yesterday I dont wanna see tomorrow, Remember when you told me That I was better off dead, I knew it from the start I was never any good to anyone, You can believe it When im not here tomorrow, Today I find something great Today I find a Healthy Affliction.
Gord
2020-08-26 12:57 pm
In defense, elected one, My experiment, my estimates, Defend the world, Descended of. He thinks of them vulgar, His second son, Gordon. Smacked on his buttocks, Told: Invent the world, Which will never come, With medicine life crumbles.
crybaby
2020-08-20 11:23 am
i met you on a friday night it was all good and fun i was stressed and fatigue i knew im out of your league but well i tried i tried and i tried and i tried having your attention i lied and i lied and i lied to earn your affection when the party was over you said let’s grab a toaster and then you took me over we got in to your rover then days and weeks came and went but granny had a heart attack you said depression sucked and you only felt love when you were drunk i tried and i tried and i tried stopping you, making you stay i lied and i lied and i lied to look like im okay you are an alcoholic no heart but many lovers our love was narcotic daydreaming like it’s summer i wish we could go back i wish you were sober i think that it’s so bad that i am so so sad while here you are over this shit i wish i could go back i wish i could know that if you loved me in that moment when your eyes weren’t open and the time got frozen real quick
crybaby
2020-08-14 09:18 am
im so high and not because of drugs but because of love it’s alright i said what ive said and i meant what ive meant it’s so nice i just wanna be yours wanna be close wanna mean more to you i just wanna see you wanna kiss you wanna hear more from you and baby maybe it’d a big mistake to tell you i cant live without you, but only the dead dont make mistakes and im so alive when i think ‘bout you. i hope you’ll find peace in me cause i found peace in you and i know that im kinda freaky, it’s cuz im crazy in love with you. for freedom id give my life for love id give my freedom for you id give my love my life now has a reason im trying so hard not think about you, not fall in love with you. but what if it’s too late? and if it’s too late, baby what should i do? what should i do when everything’s against this love? what should i do when i dont know what you want? what should i do when i have so many questions but dont know the answers? what should i do when, what should i do when, baby what should i do?
crybaby
2020-08-14 09:15 am
a kinda happy stuff i wrote while i was thinking about you
i wrote down my thoughts while you were on my mind
this is my happy song my first happy song and it’s about you like all my sad songs are like all my sad songs yeah they’re all about you. i feel like when we talkin’ cuz yeah we’re talkin’ it’s like we’re bondin’ it’s all about chemicals. i feel like when you smilin’ cuz yeah you’re smilin’ yeah you’re so beguilin’ it’s all about miracles. and it’s sooo good you made me feel like this you can’t even imagine it how how happy i am right now how how happy i am right now. na na na na na na na naaa na na na na na na na naaa nah, im not sad anymore i dont meet sadness no more while im on a date with her sister called anxiety oh no ‘what if you cheat on me what if you smile at him?’ that’s not me. ‘what if you run away and we never talk again?’ you asked me. oh please don’t do this to me just kill the party with me and we’ll never leave this life come on kill the party with me and let’s leave this house and i keep on smiling yeah im still smiling you did this to my body it’s all about romance. my life used to be a mess it was such a mess but with you it’s not like that it’s all about romance. and it’s sooo good you made me feel like this you can’t even imagine it how how happy i am right now how how happy i am right now. na na na na na na na naaa na na na na na na na naaa
Gord
2020-06-08 05:39 am
No brittle bones, paid for sickness, For where it goes is nonsense. Undying, nobody throws spear immortal, Even if the wind vied in cordial, Simple wounds seal of licks and moans. My immortal man made of sticks and stones, Drowns in cordial, healed by cordial, Acting cordial among the crude oil.
azuresky96
2020-05-26 07:30 pm
The sun begins to set in the horizon I muster up the courage to walk like royalty With a few hours of rest, I think I am ready. Heart beats fast, hands are sweaty My brain feels like a time bomb. How do you get ready when you're not ready at all? Standing like a scarecrow I'm the one getting scared Why did you have to choose me? I just want to curl up or even flee. No one else seems to relate I must survive this time. As I leave, the moon begins its work. That's it for today. Tomorrow calls for another chance.
Lynn
2020-04-29 12:56 am
it's my turn to put away the dishes it's the same knife i use to cut strawberries in the mornings the sucrose covers my hands. do you think blood is the same kind of sticky? will it come off with soap and water and elbow grease? will it even matter?
Kody
2020-02-19 09:42 am
Bin thinking all night Which goes outside Bin worried of bin left out Too much trash inside my house Do neighbors above jest? When no one bin in flight Do the angels laugh at our distress? Despite a sky with all yards in sight In desserts I have bin Now I know which truck rolls in Now my neighbors learn from me My bin is full of trash and now Peace
Gord
2019-10-17 12:16 pm
Asparagus, are you aspirant plus, A spare, or pair of gloves, Au Pair, in a pear of groves, As parallel was, as it will grow, Outrageous, as pairs will go. Beans of green fielded, ate, All the others upon my plate, Clean, of childish readings. Late, all the others, Plate clean of childish things, Like television and admirings.
Gord
2019-02-06 07:32 pm
Sidewalks broken on my boulevard, Auburn hair where I used to walk, Talk, and think of her dialogue. I'd thought greenery would fall, Replaced with concrete barriers, Perhaps I'd talked too freely, Told one too many tale too tall To still be taken seriously. Discreet forever, words picky, Discrete for ever, world sticky, Disformity for even worms licking. Take me away from this place, For even screaming and kicking, Seeing worse, feeling indignant. Not to curse the growing infant, But the plants must go. No handlebars rusted, To bikes comprised of broken dreams, No van full of children hopeful, Just a van to the hospital, please, My heart is about to explode to pieces.
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